Weirdness

Ok, so I’m only doing this so I can be like everyone else…Haha no um I guess it feels good to get stuff off your chest. Hmm what’s on my chest besides my boobs…ooh something this weird lady did a while ago has been on my mind. Ok, so me and my mom decided to take a trip to Louisiana for some boudin because it only tastes good if it’s from Louisiana! So we’re in Louisiana picking up some boudin (and if you don‘t know what boudin is well…I am sorry) and this lady strikes up a conversation with us. So she’s like:

Weird lady: Where y’all from?
Us: We’re from Texas
Weird lady: Oh my sister lives there I go there all the time. Y’all just down here for some boudin?
Us: Yeah we can’t find any boudin like this in Houston!

Ok so this seems like a nice convo to be having with someone right? Ok, well imagine that this woman is standing maybe oh a foot away from you and is slapping your arm. You know when people get excited and they slap your arm? Yeah, that was this woman. Not once, not even twice (which may have been acceptable)…she seriously hit me like five times. I felt like I was in a skit from SNL or something and THEN in between slaps she just rested her hand on my arm. Ok…I am not a touchy feely kind of a person. I mean…I have a personal space bubble! My own little comfort zone. I stay in my bubble and you stay in yours that’s the way it works…her hand was there for like a good five seconds between slaps. Ok count to five right now…isn’t that a little long to be having your hand on someone you just met. Oh well, that’s all I have for now.

-Lecy


Hello God, it’s me…Margaret
God: Crap. Guys, it’s Margaret again
Angles: What? Again?
Margaret: God…Gretchen got her period today and I was wondering…when will I get mine?
God: Are you serious? You want your period? This is what you come to me for…
Margaret: I want to be a women like her…
God: You’re 12 freakin years old. Do you know that most women curse me for that?
Margaret: Oh wait…oh never mind God I just got my period thank you!!!
God: …I hate you
Angels: God you can’t say that!
God: She’s not even listening! Can you hear that? I God, DO NOT like you, Margaret!!!
Angels: God come on man
God: No, she’s going to hear it from every man from now until she’s forty when her lesbian best friend converts her! Might as well start now!
Amen!!